Kindness Shouldn't Be Taken For Weakness

Nothing impresses me more in a person than kindness. Not intelligence, skill, humour or confidence just sheer genuine kindness. In such a tough, critical, negative society we live in it is so rare to find people with patience and kindness. It is said that you have to be strong, thick skinned and tough to live in this world. Why can't kindness be linked into strength and power? Why are people too quick to assume that if you are a kind person who often helps people out in need that it's a weakness and something to be taken advantage of. Kind people do not get the respect they deserve and in this blog post i am going to say why we need kindness, patience and the sensitivity that comes with it.

As someone who constantly tries to be a kind and wants to help people out as much as i can it's so easy to be taken advantage of or be seen as a weak person who is being taken for a mug. A lot of people are only in it for themselves so are less likely to repay the gesture. If you are in this situation i suggest that you select carefully who you give your time and generosity to. A lot of people don't have the patience these days in such a chaotic world we live in. People are less likely to give money to the homeless or help out an old lady with her shopping and it's sad that people think they don't have time for something that wouldn't take a few minutes out of your day. Giving at least 5 minutes out of your day to help someone could really make their day and spread positivity that desperately needs spreading.

Positivity is so powerful and contagious that i don't get that something that can encourage positivity and make people happy is seen as a weakness in a person. People may think you're kind because you want to get people to like you, there is another motive to your kindness or it's not a real part of your personality. What gets to me is it can't just be seen as a genuine trait that you are proud to have because that is how i feel about it. It's so rare to find someone like this so when i do i make sure i treasure their kindness and generosity and never take it or them for granted and i think it's something more of us should think about. There are too many selfish, narrow minded, negative people that we shouldn't be adding to it and instead showing kindness, being friendly and having patience for people.

I will always believe that people who make an effort to be kind and nice to others will go further in live and not only in success but because they are being positive within themselves by reflecting these positive personality traits. If people take advantage or don't appreciate your kindness and generosity then find people who do. Find people with the same mindset as you because by surrounding yourself with positivity can only lead to good things. I am a huge believer in good karma as well as bad karma and this is what motivates me to do good and always try and be a better, kinder person. Nothing pleases me more than making others happy, giving advise for those in need, making people smile and simply appreciating people's positivity and kindness. Showing people this appreciation will only encourage them to keep being kind.

A simple smile or a hug could really make someone's day and that is extremely powerful and enlightening that it always baffles me when people are cruel and horrible to others to make themselves feel better. If someone is behaving this way to you just remember they are the insecure ones because they have to make others feel down to feel good about themselves. This is a sign of weakness not being kind or generous to others but putting others down for their own selfish pleasure.

We shouldn't have to change who we are to fit the standards of society and you can have a mixture of strength and kindness. Just because you are a kind person doesn't automatically mean you are weak or not genuine.

Being Dark Haired

It is only natural that our bodies are covered in hairs as we are mammals however when that body hair is pretty prominent because you have dark hair this is when you may start to feel insecure. Society still think it's acceptable to portray women as hairless and if they do have hair in places that they wouldn't think as normal this is an extremely negative thing. In the real world as someone with extremely dark hair I know that being hairless is a blatant lie and a standard I cannot live up to. It is hard accept having noticeable body hair especially in places such as arms, back, upper lip etc. because we are constantly showed photographs of women with only hair on her eyebrows, head and that is it even if they have really dark hair.

As hard as it is to accept and feeling extremely envious when I see girls with extremely fair body hair, so fair that they can get away with not shaving/waxing their legs.In an idea world I would love to not have to pluck my eyebrows or shave anywhere because it isn't something us ladies enjoy doing and can be such a chore. One good thing about living in England is that it's always so cold so I don't have to worry about shaving my legs on a regular basis however when it is summer it's a constant thing to do because they are so dark.

When it comes to attracting the opposite sex I get extremely insecure about my body hair because it's not something that is seen as attractive or desirable in fact it is probably seen as the complete opposite and there is a point where body hair on a girl is seen as completely alien as if it shouldn't happen and is a crime. Even though I am pretty insecure about my body hair I will not be with someone who sees it as a negative thing and will only be with someone who accepts it as it is and can look past it. There is nothing wrong with being dark haired it's natural and completely fine.

Being darked haired does have it's good points as well as it's bad such as prominent eyebrows that I do not need to fill in and I like having thick dark hair.

The sooner we accept the facts that some girls have thicker/darker body hair than others and are covered in hairs just like every single other human the easier it will be for women and girls who have dark body hair to accept it and realise it's just a part of life and we can't change it so we should embrace our natural ways. It is hard not to think it isn't normal because the media and society don't help matters by not embracing nature in beauty.

It has been something I've been insecure at from a young age, it started when I was made fun of at only 11 by having noticeable upper lip hair and constantly being told I had a moustache it got so bad I started to hate the word moustache and decided to do something about it at only 12 years old. I shouldn't have been worried about such meaningless stuff at a very young age. Things like this annoy me because it's not something you want to think about at such a young age and it's now something I have to commit to forever. If you are unsure what to do I will advise you to wait as long as possible and don't make a decision right away. I find that talking to girls who have the same problem helps a lot because everyone has body hair whether that's really fair or quite prominent. Girls have testosterone just less of it however some women react to it different to others that is why some women will have longer/darker body hair and can feel like they have more hair than men. It isn't someone we can change so I feel that it would make things a lot easier if we all accepted body hair on females as a part of nature.

Let me know if you have these problems and hopefully this post does help if you do. 

Being A Highly Sensitive Person

Many people will think that being a highly sensitive person is weak, not good for you and cowardly. There are actually some good points to being highly sensitive however a lot of people don't have the patience to find out these good traits. I'm going to talk about what being a highly sensitive person means to me and if you can relate to some or all of these points then you probably are too a highly sensitive person. It doesn't mean there's anything wrong with you it just means that you function differently to the majority.

Being highly sensitive means that you can't be in busy or chaotic environments for too long such as a busy shopping centre or crowded places where you can't hear yourself think. If you are in one of these situations you will have to leave pretty quickly out of this place else you will feel overwhelmed and exhausted. If you can't get out of these situations as quickly as you'd like to then you might become to feel anxious and stressed out. In these situations e.g. at a nightclub or a concert you might feel the urge to just leave and get 10 minutes time out every so often especially if you feel tired anyway but I always feel tired in these situations. 

You will make time specifically to be alone, especially after being in an overstimulated situation. Not just alone but in a quiet, peaceful environment where you feel comfortable. It is hard for you to relax in any other situation so it is really important that you take time out of your day to be alone. 

Any subtle noise such as a ticking clock, even the sound of someone breathing, someone walking about will irritate you more than the average person especially when you are trying to relax or go to sleep. I am not able to sleep unless I can't hear anything and my room is pitch black. 

Loud people drain you, even if they aren't talking directly to you when you see a loud person you will instantly start to feel irritated and tired just from watching them. I'm not saying it's bad to be a loud person just that if you are friends with someone with a big personality then you will make time for them and prepare for that kind of personality. 

Caffeine and alcohol will affect you more than the average person which means you are probably a lightweight and suffer bad hangovers in the morning. To others it might just be a regular hangover however for you it feels like someone has smashed a brick against your face because the pain is intensified. This means that I am not a fan of alcohol and would much prefer avoiding it. 

As a highly sensitive person I like to spend the majority of my time on my own and in my head analysis things that most people would dismiss and not care about. This is probably not very healthy however it does mean we notice things others don't no matter how subtle and this could come in very useful. This is probably why highly sensitive people are incredibly creative because we have the patience and attention to detail.

People's attitude and emotions can really affect how you are feeling such as if someone is being negative and constantly moaning this will put you in a place where you feel the same and exhausted from their negative energy, It is incredibly hard for a HSP to dismiss their behaviour and get on with their own thing. It is seriously unhealthy for a HSP to be around these people more than people who are not highly sensitive. Their negative energy won't just affect you when you are with them but the rest of the day you'll most probably be analysing their behaviour and wonder if it's you who caused it when it probably wasn't.

You are very self centred not in a vain way but in a way where you think in crowded places or if you go up to the loo in a cinema or a crowded room that everyone is looking at you and what you are doing. Or if you are with a friend having a conversation in a quiet environment where people can hear you this is very off putting for a HSP because you think everyone is listening to you.This is part of the reason you find it so exhausting in over stimulated situations because your mind can't take in all the information at once.

Being highly sensitive means that you most probably have really sensitive skin which means certain types of clothes make you feel really uncomfortable e.g. too tight, the fabric irritates you, not smooth enough, feel too hot in it or really itchy. I hate wearing high waisted stuff and tops that cover the neck. Primark clothes are probably a big no no for you unfortunately.

I hope you liked this post and let me know if you can relate to any of these traits or if you know someone who does.